Posted: Wed May 18, 2011 9:03 am
Most of the remaining Allegiance players are far above changing light bulbs.MrChaos wrote:QUOTE (MrChaos @ May 17 2011, 11:17 AM) How many Allegiance players does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Before the light bulb got changed someone would create a system to discern who the best light bulb changer was. When it didn't work, someone else would create another one. When it didn't work, someone else would create another one. When it didn't work, The Creator would get extremely tetchy and loudly declare that it did. When it still didn't work, they'd get the Vice Deputy Creator to loudly declare that it did, and it should be implemented immediately because The Creator had spent a lot of time on it, and well it just wasn't fair otherwise. The fact that it really, really, really didn't work would be ignored. This wouldn't be about changing light bulbs, this would be about politics, and recognition and the glory of devising an awesome system that purported to show who the very best light bulb changers in the realm were.
All the while, mere mortal light bulb changers, those untouched by the hand of The Chosen Ones, would be disappearing. Falling victim to the troll that now lived in the dark space below what had once been a working light bulb. No matter, would say The Chosen Ones, we now almost have a perfect system for deciding upon who should be on the light bulb changing team. We'll have that light bulb changed and shining as good as new in the next couple of weeks, just you wait and see. Meanwhile the troll would grow ever fatter, and the pool of light bulb changers would get ever smaller. No matter "they" would say, if we could just implement some improvments to the system for selecting the bestest ever light bulb changers, our problems would be solved. Well, the few remaining light bulb changers would think, what can possibly go wrong? The Chosen Ones have served us so well, for so long. Our troll wins the annual all nations troll sumo contest every single year, he is the hugest troll in the whole world. "But shouldn't we be focusing on changing light bulbs, not training trolls" one dissenting little voice would probably say. "You go walk in the place under what used to be the working light bulb". The Chosen ones would reply.
The day would come when the system would be considered even more perfect than the very vision of perfection that it was when it was first created. "It is now time to decide who is going to be on the light bulb changing team". Declared The Chosen Ones. Nobody would answer, for nobody would remain. The troll would have finally consumed everybody except for The Chosen Ones.
On the bright side, at least the last person out wouldn't have to turn off the light.
*Disclaimer. The persons and places depicted in this light bulb changing example are purely fictious, and are not intended to resemble anybody, living in a shed.*
The persons who have worked their guts out maintaining the light bulbs for so long have my top respect. Server operators, code twiddlers, security operatives, facilitators and all of the other do'ers. The people who insist that the system for ranking light bulb changers do as well. For although we may disagree that it works, or that a version that actually does work is even a desirable thing, I acknowledge and respect the time and efforts they have ploughed in. I still hope that LBSkill dies a swift and painless death after its long, painful and damaging gestation though.
